Sep 22, 2012

Autumnal Equinox

 I know it's been awhile. Nothing in particular. Just busy driving middle school students on a very long route. I have a challenging route with a 'charter' school in our district. Families can 'choice' in, but majority are students that are there because regular district schools 'aren't working for them'. Many reasons/dynamics for that. Many lump them into 'problem kids'...but majority of the time, in my personal opinion, they are students that just don't get TIME. Time: talking with the kids not talking at them...huge difference...whether it's parents, teachers, and other administrators.  I have a para-professional on my bus as well...helping. She is excellent with what I just said regarding talking and giving time. We both have developed great report.  The stories.... if you just let them talk. We have gained trust of many. We hold that scared. Mother that died as a result of drugs-living at foster home.... Another  mom  in jail..... Another's Dad just left the family.... Another never wants to go home-especially on Fridays.... another has a brother that is already 'two sheets to the wind' by the time he gets home (drinking).......
 Is my bus perfect? everyone sitting perfectly? quiet?   ... that would be a 'no', BUT if given the chance they really can self-regulate and no 'over the top' behavior...as I call it. I will be honest, there are about three out of the 24 that...cannot. Some rely on negative attention as the only thing they're used to having. It really is sad that they  cannot accept positive attention perhaps not knowing what that is.  This is the challenge and I feel this year...as I go through my own 'challenges' I have absolutely been led to this bus load this year!
Seasons. Many love Fall. I like the scarecrows, the decorations, the changing leaves, but more often than not, I feel like a long season of 'coming to the end'...dying of things, shedding leaves (like shedding skin)...sometimes I feel a little down. I remember this even back in Elementary school!
But one cannot have growth and rebuilding without shedding the old...it's a must. It's needed.
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A year ago my journey lead me to live in a nice apartment on Stetson Hills Blvd. with the unknown feeling of my future as I was about to move...I had very uneasy feelings back than. If anything positive has come out of these changing of seasons over this past year, it is the fact- I do not have those uneasy feelings anymore because now I feel I am exactly where I'm suppose to be. What a feeling that is......

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

John Steinbeck , himself, could not have written that any better if not as well.You're the best thing that ever happened to THAT bus! love,Bill

zippiknits said...

You are, in a word, Wonderful. You are wonderful for the caring and the wisdom you use to help kids who are dealing with so much MORE than they can,or are willing to, relate to an adult.

And thanks for the pictures of Nugget. She's happy to be with you, and that's easy to see.